Martha Stewart Fan of Sexting and Threesomes

Who wants to hear the sexual habits of 71-year-ol Martha Stewart? No one? Well, too freaking bad, I am going to give you all the dirty details. Martha was on Bravo’s, ‘Watch What Happens Live’ this week and she shared a little too much information.

The host of the show Andy Cohen asked Martha to play a little game of, “Did Martha Do It?” and Martha being her wild self happily agreed to participate. Maggie Gyllenhal was also on the show and Andy would first ask her if she thought Martha did ____ and then Martha would either confirm or deny.

The first question he asked was, “Martha, have you had a one night stand?” Maggie guessed that Martha had and she was correct, which is nothing shocking. She’s been on this earth 71 years, I am sure she has had plenty of one night stands. However, the questions then got more and more daring.

Andy asked if she had ever had a sexual experience with a woman before. Maggie guessed, “I think yes.” However, she was wrong on that one. Stewart denied ever sleeping with a woman, but what about sexting? She was asked if she had ever sexted and she revealed that she had! Which surprised everyone in the building, including Maggie who incorrectly guessed that she hadn’t.

“I’m so happy to hear that! So that’s who those texts were from the other night. Martha!” Cohen said jokingly. And then the game went on, Martha said that she has never taken a hit of acid (thank god) and she’s never been in a strip joint. However, when she was asked if she had ever been involved in a threesome, she smirked and said, “Maybe.”

Come on now, really? If she did have a threesome, that means it was with two guys, right? Because she said she’s never been with another woman. All I can think about now is Martha Stewart getting pounded in her kitchen by two dudes. This is not how I wanted to start off my weekend.

Stewart didn’t talk about sex the entire show, though. She also talked about the Paula Deen controversy,

“She’s a public figure. And I know you have to be extremely careful being a public figure. I just feel you have to really watch yourself, especially in this day and age, with cameras all over you and Google.”

Ah, yes. Google is always watching, Martha. I think I saw Google following me the other day on the highway, although they weren’t blending in all that well. The car had “Google” plastered all over it and had this big ass camera on it. It followed me for a few miles, but I think I lost it at a traffic light.