BET Awards Full list of Winners and Chris Rock’s Best Jokes from Last Night
Let’s start off with the good stuff, Chris Rock. Chris Rock did his thing. He was a perfect fit at the perfect venue. He was at a place where offensive standup comedy lives and breathes. He went where few people would go including going right at Jay Z and Beyonce. He even fed black people chicken! Albeit it was Chicken and Waffles he got away with it. He passed out Styrofoam containers telling Paris Hilton she was black for the night and telling Rick Ross he brought him a salad.
Here are a few of Rock’s funniest targets and jokes: [more…]
JUSTIN BIEBER
When Chris Rock introduced Usher he said that usher,
“discovered Justin Bieber and now he’s going to spend the rest of his life apologizing for it.”
RICK ROSS
“Dre has Beats, Rock Ross has Dia-beats“
He also showed a skit where Rick Ross was called Mr. T and Chris Rock described him to white people as the Black Santa Clause of Kwanza.
CHRIS BROWN
He said of Chris Brown,
“He just signed a new deal, Too bad it was a plea deal.”
After Brown’s performance Rock said that,
“He was dancing as if he was free!”
JAY-Z and SOLANGE
“Solange hit the right rapper—Jay’s a businessman now, he can’t just go punching girls in the face—he’s got a meeting with Nabisco in the morning.”
SCANDAL
He said the reason why white people love the show is because the President is still white.
“White people get to tune in and feel good. For one hour, it’s just back to normal.”
OPRAH WINFREY
In regards to her performance in the Butler. He said the real reason that she should have one an Oscar was for her acting job,
“That acting job was amazing because she had to imagine she was poor!”
WHAT WAS NIKI MINAJ’S NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE?
Good question. We actually still don’t know. She gets the award for “Most Annoying”. You know I’m not a fan and this little acceptance speech didn’t do anything for our relationship. She just rambled on looking for attention which everyone is giving her. After continually praising herself for writing her own lyrics and telling us how FAB she is, she spoke of a near death experience but didn’t provide any details. Towards the end of her speech she said,
“The other day, literally I didn’t tell anybody this, I really thought I was about to die. Like, I was saying my prayers to die. And I didn’t even want to call the ambulance because I thought, ‘Well if I call the ambulance, it’s going to be on TMZ,'”
“And I would rather sit there and die,”
“And it made me realize I don’t care what anybody got to say. I’m going to do me.”
BOO FREAKIN HOO.
FULL LIST OF WINNERS
Without further adieu here is the Full list of Winners from the 2014 BET Awards:
- Best Female R&B/Pop Artist: Beyonce Knowles
- Best Male R&B/Pop Artist: Pharrell Williams
- Best Group: Young Money
- Best Collaboration: Beyonce Knowles (featuring Jay-Z) – “Drunk in Love”
- Best Male Hip Hop Artist: Drake
- Best Female Hip Hop Artist: Nicki Minaj
- Video of the Year: Pharrell Williams – “Happy”
- Video Director of the Year: Hype Williams
- Best New Artist: August Alsina
- Best Gospel Artist: Tamela Mann
- Best Actress: Lupita Nyong’O
- Best Actor: Chiwetel Ejiofor
- YoungStars Award: KeKe Palmer
- Best Movie: “12 Years a Slave”
- Subway Sportswoman of the Year: Serena Williams
- Subway Sportsman of the Year: Kevin Durant
- Coca-Cola Viewers’ Choice Award: August Alsina (featuring Trinidad Jame$ – “I Luv This S**t”
- Centric Award: Jhene Aiko – “The Worst”
- Best International Act UK: Krept & Konan
- Lifetime Achievement Award: Lionel Richie
- Fandemonium Award: Beyonce Knowles
